Friday, May 8, 2020

Friday Covfefe...82.7% Gluten Free. :)

I wish I could spend the whole day doing this.  :)

 

Is this even real or just heavily edited? 

                                

What the hell is chasing you?  :) 

                               

Million dollar smile. 




 

 



 

This is just sweet and cute.  :)


A 392 year old Greenland Shark in the Arctic Ocean, wandering the ocean since 1628.


Found this on some cock sluts blog.  :)




 

John Lennon and Yoko Ono waiting for the maid to make up the bed so they can continue protesting against the system, 1969. 



Wednesday, May 6, 2020

Queening Stool - FaceSitting Bench - BDSM Furniture






 



 


Pants...

I...have pants. Purple pants. Purple pantaloons. :)


She's got some kickass pants!  :)


These...are some really big...."pants". 





Colorized photo of a marketplace in the central Mexican state of Aguascalientes, where vendors are seen with stalls full of hats in the period between 1884 and 1900. 


Extraordinarily Detailed Sculpture.
Some people have amazing talent and vision. 
I'd love to be one of them. :)

                                

‘The female body is a… work of art. 
The male body is utilitarian, it’s for gettin’ around, like a Jeep.’ 
~ Elaine Benes from Seinfeld  :) 

Fetish Definitions...


One would not think this should be required on a fetish venue...but due to a plethora of neophytes recently expounding fallaciously on their "expertise" of said fetishes...you know  

ProDommes 
Phone Sex Dommes 
OnlyFans Dommes 
Rent-A-Dommes 
Panty Selling Dommes  
Dingbat Dumb Dommes 
Don't-Own-A-Fucking-Dictionary-Dommes
AlphaCucks
Dominant Cucks
Dildo Dicked Cucks
Single Virgin Cucks
Stag Bulls
Stag Cucks
Stagnating Bulls
Bullish Stags
Impotent Staggly Cuckish Bovine Half-Man Steer Bulls
Etc...

Cuckold: A man whose wife is sexually unfaithful, often regarded as an object of derision.

Compersion:  Joy from witnessing another's enjoyment of something. Vicarious joy associated with seeing one's partner have a joyful sexual or romantic relation with another. 

Candaulism: A sexual practice or fantasy in which a man exposes his female partner, or images of her, to other people for their voyeuristic pleasure.  

Swinging: The practice of engaging in group sex or the swapping of sexual partners within a group, especially on a habitual basis. 

Cuckquean: In the fetish cuckqueaning subculture, the male takes on the role of being sexually dominant, while the female takes on a submissive role.   

Orgy: A wild party, especially one involving excessive drinking and unrestrained sexual activity. 

Threesome: A threesome is sexual activity involving three people. 

Ménage à Trois: n arrangement in which three people share a sexual relationship, typically a domestic situation involving a married couple and the lover of one of them. 

Le Vice Anglais: A French phrase meaning 'the English vice'. It sometimes refers to sadomasochism (gaining sexual pleasure by beating or whipping people).  

Roman: Refers to the (somewhat inaccurate) concept and history of Roman orgies.

Greek: Greek sex is a euphemism for anal sex. Ancient Greeks were accepting of romantic or sexual relationships between males. 

Golden Shower: Slang for the practice of urinating on another person for sexual pleasure, as part of urolagnia.  

Sadism: The practice of inflicting pain. Marquis de Sade (1740–1814), 18th-century French writer, from whom the term sadism was coined.

Masochism: The practice of seeking pain because it is pleasurable, named for Leopold von Sacher-Masoch from Lviv.

Sadomasochism: The giving or receiving of pleasure from acts involving the receipt or infliction of pain or humiliation. The name being a combo of "Sadism" + "Masochism". 

BDSM, one who engages in the erotic (sexual) practices, interpersonal dynamics, or roleplaying involving Bondage, Dominance and Submission, and Masochism. Though some say the "D" stands for Discipline rather than Dominance.   

The list goes on and on if people would just Google it. 
Google has more than just shoes, sports scores and porn. 
Anyway I've not only lost all interest in this...I've also lost my pants.  :)

Monday, May 4, 2020

First Visit to a Professional Dominatrix.

(Submitted by a reader. Unedited by me. ) 

  

Hello miss Chaland,

my first encounter with a professional dominatrxi was with domina Cecile.
I was about 25 years old and was 'more than interested' in BDSM.
However, living with my parents didn't make things easier on the parts of erotica.

Anyway, I found an add of mistress Cecile in our local papers.
'Mistress Cecile awaits you in her SM-cellar. Phone:xxxxxxx'.
I had to wait to have the house for me alone, took courage and rang the phone.
It went over a few times and then 'voicemail'.
Damn, I hung up.
I redialed it and spoke to her voicemail, urging her not to phone back after a certain hour. My parents would likely be home at that time, you see.

After some time the phone rang and I answered.
It was her, mistress Cecile.
'Hi, this is Cecile. Can I speak to Marco, please?', she said.
'Yes, I am Marco', I replied, my heart racing.
'Hello Marco. Sorry, I was in the middle of a session'.
The way she said 'session', it was like she was reliving it with enjoyment.
'That's okay', I replied and I asked her for some information, apologising for my nervousness and 'maybe stupid questions'.
She laughed it away and said it was fine.
She told me where her SM-cellar was. It was just 20 minutes away by car, based under a known sex-shop.
'Just ask for Cecile, but I always work with appointments', she added.
I asked her how this 'SM' was going to work out for me.
'Well', she said, 'I am going to make you horny and for every time you get hornier, I am going to give you a bit of pain. Than I am rewarding you with arousing you more, followed by a sensation of pain'.
'It's all based on consensus, you tell me your likes and dislikes and I make sure we have a good time together'.
I asked if I was getting an orgasm during the session. She confirmed.
Her price was 300 guilders for an hour.
I took courage and asked her how she looked.
'Well, I am mid 20 years old, about 5 foot tall, blond hair, curvy body and have a D-cup'.
I told her how I looked and thanked her for the call.
I would call her back for an appointment real soon.
'That's okay', see you'.
I hung up, my imagination running and a erection that needed attention.

A day later I asked for a day off work, asked if I could borrow my parents' car and called her back from a public phone.
I told my trusted colleague Gertie what my plans were.
'Good for you, Marco. Just go for it'.

So the day came and after a fresh shower I went out.
My parents didn't ask anything.
I parked the car a few streets away from the sexshop and went straight inside it.
My heart was racing.
Inside was a single customer talking with the owner of the shop.
'Excuse me sir, but I am looking for Cecile', I asked him.
'Cecile?'
'Sure, follow me', he said and we went to this door.
As he opened it, there were stairs going down and he called out, 'Cecile?'
'Hello?', was her reply from inside the room.
'You can go down', he said and pointed downstairs.
I walked down and knocked at the door on the bottom.
'Come in', she said and I did.

Well, she wasn't kidding about her looks, miss Chaland.
I don't recall her as a looker, but she had a real nice face and a friendly smile.
She was wearing high heels, a leather skirt and dito top without sleeves, everything black. It was low cut with a zipper in front.
She was a bit plus sized, but that's the kind of lady I like most.
Firm legs in black stockings and the top was clearly filled with a big set.
Being a 'boob-man', I loved that.
As I shook her hand she asked me if I was her 'appointment for 14:00 hour'.
I confirmed it.

I gave her a note I made with my 'do and do not' and the phantasy.
The phantasy was that Cecile was my teacher and that she had enough of my 'uncalled erections' and she was eager to finish it once and for all.
So I was asked for 'home schooling' on night a her house and found myself in her cellar.
'Look, since it's your first time, let's say we do 30 minutes. If you like it, we proceed the full hour and if you don't like it, we stop. You than pay me 200 guilders for the
half hour or 300 guilders for the whole hour', Cecile said.
'Is that a fair offer, Marco?', she asked me.
'Yes, I think that's a good idea'.
'Do I have to be carefull for leaving any marks on your body, Marco?' 
I said I lived with just my parents, no lover.
She nodded and ordered me to undress.
'Underpants too?', I asked her.
'Yes', she said.
I took them off and covered my manhood, knowing that in a few seconds Cecile was going to see it anyway.

'Okay, we are going to play now, Marco. The safe word is 'Uncle'. When you use that, the session stops immediatly and will not continue'.
'If I am doing something you don't enjoy anymore, ask me to stop it, and if I am doing something you like but can't take anymore, ask for mercy'.
'I will return on what I was doing, but give you some time to collect yourself and I'll do something else, okay?'
I rehearsed what she said to me and then she said', than we start now'.

'Put your hands aside, Marco!', she ordered me. 'Are you hiding something behind them?' Her eyes locking with mine.
As I put them aside, Cecile looked down and smiled. I think she fell a bit out of character.
I still had my pubic hair in those days, miss Chaland.
My full erection is, in terms of statistics, below the majority.
However, it functions perfectly and fits nicely to my body and I feel no shame about it.
Dominatrix Cecile could only conclude that I was 'very, very happy' to see her.

'Thougth so, erect again! You seem to have a boner all the time, don't you, Marco?', Cecile said.
'No miss', I replied.
'Still denying and still correct in language. Come here!'
As I stood before here, she put a thin rope around my erection and started to tighten it. She also separated my balls with the rope. It looked really nice and I could 
feel the pressure building up inside.
'There, now you won't climax that easily, running around with a erection!'
'Sorry miss', I replied.
'That doesn't help you. Here, bend over that footstool and you can count the spankings till I reach 10. Only count the ones that hurt, okay'.
As I went to it to bend over it, my erection was in the way.
'It seem you have a big problem in the way, Marco!'
I nodded and layed my chest on the stool.
Cecile started to give me a spanking. I was warned only to count the ones that really hurt me and always say 'thank you, mistress' after the number.
She tricked me a few times by throwing in softer slaps and after a while I gritted 'ten, thank you, mistress' through my teeth.

She was very pleased with my performance.
I remember that she caressed my nipples and how it put more pressure in my erection.
She clipped 2 green clamps on my nipples.
It had 3 positions and I could take the middle. 'Well done, but you are going to feel them real good when I take them off', she told me.
I was introduced to a number of 'pain sensations', followed by some tease and denial.
In one of them the clamps were attached to my wrist-bands with a rope. I was ordered to sit on my knees and mistress Cecile zipped her top open.
She had very nice boobs, full and firm. Pink nipples. I did notice some scar tissue, but not from implants.
'You may touch them', mistress Cecile said.
As I approached them, mistress Cecile raised her knee to my chest and leaned ever more back.
After a short ime, she said, 'look at you nipples, Marco!'. I than noticed how I stretched them.
'Good boy, now sit back'.

She zipped up again and untied the clamps.
'I am going to remove them', she said with a smile.
The feeling was really painfull, but mistress Cecile pressed them and told me I did good.
She asked if I was willing to take the extra half hour. I was really into it, the time had passed with speed.
'Yes, please', I answered.
'Good. You can take a piece of equipment and spank me with it', she said plainly.
I wondered what to do and took a leather plaque.
'Good choice. You have picked to tool I am going to spank you with!'.
Again I was spanked and loved it.

I was ordered to approach the wooden cross, face towards the wood.
My wristbands were attached to the outher sides and she ordered me to stand on my toes on the ledge of the cross.
Again, my erection was in the way.
'There's that big problem again', mistress Cecile laughed and shook her head.
With some movements I could deal with it and I was given a good number of hits with a whip.
At a certain point in time mistress Cecile removed her top, giving me free looks at her large boobs.
I really loved that.

I remember how she ordered my to sit on my knees behind her.
'You may kiss my ass'.
She lifted her leather skirt and I could see the 'stay up' nylons and her pubic hair.
I caressed her round ass, felt the warmth coming from the inside of her thighs.
Touching her nylons, I went down to her high heels and kissed them.
'Nice one, Marco', she said.

She made me stand up and she started to remove the rope.
She took my manhood in her hand, 'a bit sweaty', mistress Cecile said. No wonder, it had been erect for more than 50 minutes non-stop.
'Go lie on the table, face up', she said.
She took a wet washcloth and put it over me erection.
Mistress Cecile noticed that I was watching and put a kind of collar around my neck.
It had a sharp point facing upwards, pushing my chin upwards. 'No peeking;, she said.
As she started to clean my penis, I nearly climaxed.
'Take it easy, mistress', I called out.
She made her grip a bit lesser, which helped a lot.
I took courage and asked mistress Cecile if I could please lick her nipples.
She allowed it and as I licked and sucked them, I could feel them grow and felt her breathing go a bit faster.
'How about candlewax on your nipples, penis and balls?', she asked me.
'Yes, please mistress', I said.
3 droplets of wax fell on my nipples, my penis and my balls.
It was a nice feeling and I thanked her for it.

'Now, do you think you earned an orgasm, Marco?', she asked me.
'Yes, I do, mistress Cecile', I answered.
'Well, I am going to hit your penis and balls with my crop and I want you to count the ones you feel till you reach 3'.
I tried to take as much hits as I could, but I did reach 3 after about 10 hits.
'Good', she said and I felt how she put a condom over my erection. Again I came close to an orgasm.
'How do you want to come? By hand or by mouth?', mistress Cecile asked me.
'With your mouth, please', I replied.
A moment later I did feel one hand pushing down at the base of my erection, followed by Cecile's hair on my belly and thighs.
Her mouth went around my penis and she started to move up and down, her tonque playing around.
I don't recall her or me making any sounds during the blowjob, but I do know I tried to hold on as long as I could.
It was a struggle I never could win, nor was willing to win.
The blowjob didn't take long, I was so horny that I really wanted to come. And so it happened.

Mistress Cecile raised her head and declared, 'this session is finished'.
She removed the condom and cleaned my penis, than removed the collar.
While I dressed up, she was cleaning the table.
As we both were finished, I told her I really loved the session.
I payed the full amount, of course. She was pleased and smiled.

As we shook our hands to say goodbye, something 'interesting' happened.
I don't know about mistress Cecile, but I think we had this 'moment', miss Chaland.
I still wonder what would have happened if I had the nerve to ask her out for dinner, right at that time.
I left the cellar and we never did meer again.

Kind regards,
Marco



Saturday, May 2, 2020

Snuffleupagus 2020! :)

Daaaamn!  She's just....telling it like it is.  :)


Not sure what this first photo is...must be an astronomer....looking for/at Uranus.  :)

 


 

I own guns and support the 2nd Amendment...so nobody freak out. 
Having said that, yea, some people look/act like dicks, strutting around with their guns. 


 

I didn't know they made specialty mattresses...for orgies.  :)


  

Business recession shutdown rules...
Supply and Demand.
Whatever is hard to find...the value and price increases.  :)




 



And the job went to, the lowest bidder...

 

Bioluminescent dinoflagellates along the Persian Gulf.

 

This plug is designed to go around other plugs. 

 

US (contiguous) population density map. 




Native American 3rd Gender. (Berdache - Sex Servants.)

Berdache: The term originates from the Arabic word bardaj (“slave” or “kept boy”).

In numerous Indigenous Native American cultures (and a multitude of cultures around the world, but obviously with a different name due to language differences) Berdache were considered two spirit shaman, where they often "dressed like a girl", functioned in some cases as a "second wife" and often as a slave or servant of the primary couple, but also considered to hold special “medicine” powers as healers. Not all two spirits lived as slaves, and while in some cases the term "slave" is a good descriptor, its not quite accurate. The Berdache were under the protection of someone high up in general, did women’s work, wore women’s clothes, and were generally healers as well. This was considered a place of honor, more than a place of disrespect, but they were still considered "owned" by the couple they served and serviced sexually. This might be close to what we would call bisexual today, and/or submissive, but the mindset was not quite the same as we view the world today. The point is, gender fluid people, transsexual, transvestites, gay, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, sexual submissiveness...whatever titles one might prefer to use, is nothing new. 

"Paging Cuckold Bob Berdache to Tipi Number #5!"  :)




Friday, May 1, 2020

That's it! I am Done with other Human Beings! :)

From a Fetlife thread where a meme I posted about Trump had multiple comments of agreement, and then this guy showed up. He made the comment shown below, I, of course replied in my usual...sweet and charming manner, lol. 


Then he sent me the unsolicited private message shown below.

 

I have no earthly fucking idea what this Trump asskisser is talking about. I mean first, in the message title, he calls me a bimbo. Okay, great. Then he says Trump has been vaccinated. For what? There is no coronoviurus vaccination in existence. Period! As to my "furry cunt", my alleged need to use it to make a living...and my lack of a brain...alrighty then, all I know is this cretin seriously brightened up my day! Oh, by the way...after sending me the message...he blocked me.  :)