It seems some people are of the opinion that "dominance" is a masculine trait. I don't quite get that...but in some cases I do. (Not going into the whole male dominant/female submissive aspect of this...just talking about the FemDom side of things.)
I am not at all masculine, never have been, never will be and have no desire to be, at all. I mean I am a Tomboy, but a girly...boy-Tom, lol. The notion that female sexual dominance is masculine, or needs to be, as opposed to feminine...well I think part of that is based on the depiction of some rather cheesy ProDoms that adopt that attitude, demeanor and mentality, which is not accurate and from my perspective, a total embarrassment. Witness a random selection of sample photos gleaned from the Internet to see my point.
Beyond the lack of authenticity, meaning the generic copying each other with the "crop biting" poses, the scowling, the frowning, the glaring...why? I mean why do some feel the need to act/look aggressive, hostile, mean, macho, tough, or whatever? What about soft dominance...like the photo below?
A little tease and denial, a couple love taps to his swollen blue balls, a bit of face sitting, some more teasing, polite demands, his displaying a level of obeisance, that would be, all of that, would constitute dominance right? And none of it would be viewed as being masculine, in my estimation. For me, probably about 90% of proper dominance is in the mind, the rest, of the body. I mean, without that mind connection, that mindfuckery, the mental portion, well, then it would just be beating or abusive or neglectful, and that is not something I would be involved with nor advocate for. So from the mental domination standpoint, why would one presume that needs to be masculine or feminine? That makes no sense to me. The power and will of one mind to dominate, and the will of another mind to submit is what makes a unique connection, and that has nothing to do with testosterone or estrogen.
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Annnd for something totally off topic and different, someone compiled a bunch of old clips of people dancing and overlaid it with "Born to be Alive" which amused the heck out of me. :)
And what am I listening to while creating this little nonsensical pointless post?
It's a vibe/mood thing. :)
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Tax season is right around the corner...lol. :)
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Vanessa - yours is such a good point, obviously. Women come in all shapes and sizes, all personality types. Some are super girly and others complete tomboys and some a mix of all traits but dominant women are always portrayed in a particular way. i think it is an archetypal male fantasy thing that just gets lazily regurgitated in film or image. In reality every conceivable type of woman can be dominant and someone can be in thrall to them simply through the confidence they exude or the force of their character.
ReplyDeleteWearing thigh high boots or stockings does not make a dominant, they were dominant or not before they put on the outfit. Owner never wears them whereas i would quite like to, but if i were i too i would not suddenly become either a) a woman :) or b) dominant.
i have no real idea about dominant men, the few i have encountered were mostly dicks, and not in a good way :). However, i guess the same applies to them too.
Love the song and dance vid, it brought a broad smile to my face. And as for the crooner, he looks straight out of a 70s porn flic.
Wishing you and yours a great Christmas and keep up the rants and the posts in '24. Seasons greetings
p (aka SlutLips :)
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Uniforms don't matter. I can put on the uniform and adopt the attitude and stance of a firefighter, a pilot, a welder or a cowboy...but that does *not* mean I am one. It's the true innate nature, drive, lust and desire of the woman that matters, not the attire. Anyway, thanks for the comment and the nice sentiments...SluttusLippus. :)
DeleteYeah, agree. Me dressing as a slut does not make me....Oh, wait. Perhaps it ...does? :)
ReplyDeleteP
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No comment... :)
DeleteVanessa:
ReplyDeleteI can only speak for myself, but I have been around the barn more than a few times, and I can attest that dominance knows no gender…..nor does it wear any clothes.
Natural dominance is a persona, a sense of being, a perspective on life, the makeup and fabric of an individual who possesses a personality type that often leads themselves and others into action….on a small or larger scale.
Usually there is an overarching motivation for power and a sense of pride. The dominant may be outwardly aggressive and manipulative, or often it can be more subtlety expressed, and often is; with a quiet air of confidence and tactful control of people and the surroundings. It is not being bossy...but more about commanding in an authoritative sense and assured of oneself.
For me I can sense almost immediately, or in the first few minutes if I am in the presence of a dominant person….the quieting self-confidence, the charisma, the use of words and life perspective permeates the environment.
Some of the greatest people I have had the pleasure of knowing, have such a presence about them that I knew immediately that I was in the company of a great and special person. It was an overwhelmingly quieting and peaceful feeling. I simply wanted to sit and learn and listen and feel part of their aura, and place all thoughts about myself as far in the background of my mind as possible.
And dominance doesn’t have to be kinky, or involved in FLR or BDSM….i.e. I suspect that for many of us the most dominant person in our lives, at least for the first 10 or 12 years were our Mothers, who disciplined us, taught us, dressed us, and gave us a lot of the perspective we have today.
If I had to make a decision about which gender exhibits the most dominant qualities, my choice would always be the feminine gender. So many of us of the less dominant male gender, love, adore and worship Women and often go to crazy, sometimes foolish, and often great lengths to impress, please and pleasure those wonderful and beautiful women in our lives.
I do enjoy seeing people, men or women, who have the strength and perhaps dominance to take control of their own lives, living it as they choose, rather than sitting back and allowing life to dictate to them.
But still to me, few things in life are as alluring and compelling as a naturally dominant Woman exhibiting her self-confidence, womanly pride, and leadership qualities, in a relationship where she is the dominant partner…. It truly seems to be the natural way to me.
And the video…..I too got a big kick out of watching the “born to be alive” video, more than once. I wish I could dance like that.
A nice post…thought provoking as well. Thanks.
Have a great day!
hs
All points very well stated and spot on HS. I am always amused by those that think that volume, bravado, arrogance and strutting around equals dominance or being Alpha or whatever. In reality, it's easy to see through that and see the scared childlike lack of confidence and fears that dwell deep within. It's unfortunate, amusing, but still rather sad in that transparency. One always hopes and assumes that those sorts of people will outgrow that, but who knows. Anyway, I do enjoy your insight and you taking the time to type it out, it is much appreciated. :)
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